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Posts Tagged ‘strange tube sightings’

Londoners, you rock!

June 24, 2010 8 comments

So I was on the tube today, minding my own business and being kinda after-work-grouchy (also it is actually WARM in London, which should be lovely but means that the tube is like a SAUNA only instead of the lovely woody-aromatherapy steam it’s BO-armpit steam which is not nearly as nice), when a bunch of football idiots climbed onto the tube in their football colours and sang some foreign anthem REALLY LOUD the ENTIRE WAY.  And I sat very quiet and very still while I had a little private MASSIVE HEAD EXPLOSION!!!

They even had a whistle-thingie.  And they were being LOUD and OBNOXIOUS on purpose just to annoy everyone, and you could feel the everyone in the entire carriage think that they were SO UNLUCKY to be in this particular carriage.

And this is what I love most about Londoners…

No one even looked their way.

Londoners, you guys are AWESOME.  We all know that all the shouting idiots wanted was for someone to look at them the wrong way, or to get angry, or to say something, or to ACKNOWLEDGE their sorry excuse for an existence.  They wanted to get a rise out of people and NOT ONE PERSON gave them the satisfaction.  I have never seen an entire tube carriage so interested in their newspapers.  Never seen people so intent on listening to their iPods (okay, they were totally just pretending to listen because I had my iPod volume full blast and still couldn’t hear anything above the shouting–but they were GREAT at pretending).

Ha!  Take that you annoying tube-shouters!  You are TOO BORING for us to EVEN NOTICE YOU!  Only in London could a group of strangers pull together so quickly without exchanging a single word.

Okay, so now I think I sound old and snarky but if you were there your head would have exploded as well.

The super-duper, never-heard-before secret to writing a novel in 30 days!

(Ha!  See what I did there?  Copywriting one-oh-one.)

Oh, sorry.  Did you actually want the secret?  Here it is:

Don’t.

I have been in the deep, dark pit of despair that is applying and interviewing for new jobs.  And have just turned down a job (direct-mail, selling white papers) to avoid writing headlines like this all day every day.  My soul cannot handle it.  But I fear my soul is slowly dying at the current job as well (though for other reasons).

Also, London has forgotten that it was sunny and lovely and we’ve all gotten out our summer dresses and sandals and reverted to winter!

On the plus side, however, on the tube the other day I saw a girl wearing white patent shoes, neon blue tights, neon pink shorts, a green-blue-and pink dress (all neon), a PATENT neon-pink jacket, and bright blue sunglasses.  Her boyfriend had green and blue hair.  Hooray!  A smile!

So blogger-friends, please pray (send good vibes, think happy-job thoughts, etc.) for me!

(I’m off to see what you’ve been up to)